During my daily, always delayed, Metropolitan line commute to and from Parliament my eye keeps wondering and catches the new Maestro Tube ad, which states: 'Cash has Retired.'

My problem is that my own Maestro card is as compatible as £2 coins are with the UK's vending machines. Prime example: The parking at my local car park accepts every other card for the ridiculous £4 charge except my bloody Maestro!

So I am left to contemplate life with heavily weighed down pockets and the burden, not of 'retirement age' cash, but of my work-shy Maestro card. *sigh*